Goal – Blog

Questionable Thinking – what does that really mean?

I am not sure what this means. An old army friend once told me, who without naming names was probably the most depraved individual that I had ever come across, he would ask ‘define what normal is?’ It’s something that I have questioned so many times throughout my life. Let’s face it, I have been exposed so horrible events in my life, some might call life-changing, and in some cases, I would say that I was lucky to still be alive. These events were experienced as a child, as a soldier and as a medical professional. I have truly seen the worst that human life can cause, as well as the joy it can provide. I do believe as a species, we do not deserve this earth. But this statement from my friend was like his moniker, to justify his perversions, and trust me I could write tomes on this chap, those that know me will know exactly whom I am talking about. That said, he’s a brother and love him to eternity and back.
The events that I have witnessed and have been apart of have evolved me into someone quite complex. I find things that socially I shouldn’t find funny. Nothing seems to shock me, no matter how depraved and disturbing it is. I only think of one thing during the day, as a binge eater, that is when my next meal is. Oh and dogs, listen, if you’re a writer, don’t be a douche bag and kill the dog. Even in Snatch, the character bullet tooth Tony, the hardest gangsta around couldn’t even kill the dog. I think the line went “open the dog, what’s fucking wrong with you, that’s a bit strong.” If you kill the dog, you’re literally dead to me!

The mind of a serial killer is a complex place, and as a crime writer, I have to try and put myself in their shoes, to try and see what they would see. If we set aside the serial killers and the narcissistic egomaniacs, underneath the words on the page you will find a cuddly individual who has been happily married for the past

 29 years, with two grown-up children and two adorable spaniels! Walking the spaniels is an everyday task that I have to complete, and yet there are times where I have to put myself in the mind frame of a serial killer,

even for this simple task! When I write something and give it to someone else to check, the paleness of their complexion often tells me that I have hit the right tones. I don’t purposely go out to shock, I think we like reading about stuff that is so macabre and upsetting, like pressing a bruise. gives us as the reader the sense and thrill what our imagination can produce form the fertilization of a shocking storyline.
Being a shock horror writer is a lot of fun, but the writing is just a side hustle that balances with being a surgical assistant and anesthetic tech. Conversely to writing, helping people is my passion, and I love to aid them in any way that I can by providing them with the highest possible standard of care. Then, once I get home, I get to dive deep into the mind of those who commit crimes and try to think the way they do, worryingly, this comes easy to me. You would never know that this cuddly, caring and compassionate individual can write like these people, but that’s because there is no way to know the lurkings of the mind! You can check out these books as they are currently on sale on Amazon with the blurbs readily available so you can decide which one is something you’d enjoy having a read of!
My upcoming novella called Chunk will be on sale from October 1st. To hit subscribe on my website for a discounted copy of Chunk when the book comes out. That’s about a serial killer that cooks his victims and serves them in a popular American style diner in the South West of England, now isn’t that depraved?