by Jon Biddle
Why is it we can roll out of bed on any day and be in a joyous state? We see sunlight even on the grayest of days. Everything in our tiny world is harmonious to the frequency of life.
And yet, some days, thankfully, not too many these days for me, but sometimes, even on the brightest day of the year, where the sunbeams down and warms everything in its path, but in you, the rays of sunshine do nothing but augment the blackness that has surrounded you. You feel like a cloak of sadness envelopes you, pulling you further into the abyss of isolation and worry.
In therapy when we talk about the blackness. The therapist will say that blackness cannot exist in a state of light, no shadow can exist if you shine a light on it and that’s a universal law – something that cannot be changed; its not possible.
Obstacles created the shadow cast. In this context, that’s – YOU.
We worry about the economy. We worry about our health, and how it is getting to be so bad this year? We worry about the job market, and about the possibility that this too will be the worst since the 1930s. We worry every day about the situation we’re in, bills to pay, no gas in the car, people ignoring you at work, that food in the cupboard calling your name, that beer that’s tempting you in the bar. That one-night stand on Tinder twinging your guts all the while, the news bombards us with information that is irrelevant to our wellbeing.
We worry constantly about how things that may affect those whom we care about most. Our Grandmother’s elderly illness, our children living in the big city, your wife who is in excruciating pain every day. The programs we innocuously watch while consuming an enormous bag of chips which then question our relationships, our educational progress and a falsity of who we should be, creating a negative reality in our minds.
With this kind of mental soup swirling around our cerebral space, how the hell do we get anything done?
Unfortunately, at the dinner table, we discuss and rehearse what may be in the future. We discuss and rehearse and program how our lives may look to our children, to our friends and family. We share our hopes, our fears, our dreams. But we can’t stop there.
We have to back up and lift our heads, and take a breath, and think about what is really important in the here and now.
The one thing we don’t do is heal. The one thing we don’t do is breath and be introspective, discuss and share without judgment to the people that love us the most.
In these days of too much suspicion, too much mistrust, too much communication conducted by electronic devices, and too much emphasis on information, there is the tendency to live in the here and now as if it’s some far-away place. Our insatiable need for a continued stream of data is unprecedented in our civilisation.
Understanding the teaching of Tolle – the here and now is all we have. There is no past, there is no future, there is only now. This simple yet misunderstood paradigm is for most, an impossible ascension to our true selves but requires only a small amount of effort – Okay, spoiler here, I’m sounding like the spiritual teacher Mr. Tolle. While his teachings are simple, I struggle too.
But let’s analyze deeper.
How does worry impact on our health?
Putting the psychological aspects of worry to one side for a second.
Worry physiologically releases stress hormones that increase your heart rate, messes with your blood sugars. Can lead to muscle cramps, can cause high blood pressure and then kick’s your immunity into touch. Manifesting simple infections such as colds, herpes, mouth ulcers, making it difficult to fight off more serious one. The butterflies that you feel in your guts is a contraction of your intestines. Making your stomach more acidic giving you reflux. Poorly absorbed food is expelled in often violent purges. We have all had those experiences with job interviews etc – I had it for most of my childhood. The worst of it stops you from getting laid. Listen, I’m a dude, I kind of don’t like it effects that side too sometimes.
We are never attentive to our bodies and unless your body scanning every day (people that meditate do this all the time) we miss those nuanced sensations until they manifest into something bigger, more serious. When something goes wrong, you head to your GP; you get referred and a specialist who will look and try to fix it within the realms of evidence; you go on drugs to manage the symptoms while the causation is always there, still gnawing away inside you.
So what do we do about the things in your life?
Is the life on the living side of you as good as or as bad as your desire to be?
Remember that quote?
I’m thinking that maybe the universe has seen enough of my worries to put down a sign saying I’m missing my chance. I turned 50 last year and although I enjoy being 50, I genuinely have this sensation that I am running out of time. which physically and esoterically, I am.
I am often gripped with fear, and that fear stops me from achieving. It truly is a weakness that is externally created because, for those who know me, weakness is something that doesn’t fit into my paradigm. But that inner conflict is always there. Like the rumble of distant artillery, it ebbs and flows with the wind. It’s learning to manage them and when the time comes, when they become too loud, it’s time to roll up those sleeves and get a grip of them. I show no mercy to them when they appear, the headless horsemen of the apocalypse.
The one thing that therapy has taught me is that we can ALL live a more peaceful, more momentous life, and expect peace to be upon us by paying attention to the worry inside.
Think about it.